egos.

wow. the human ego is so over-inflated and so easily breakable at the same time. it's such an interesting organism. so yesterday, i put up a few posts. two of them were song lyrics for 'you fail me' by converge and 'ain't it fun' by the dead boys. two super awesome songs. go listen to them on my myspace page before i change them. the third post was just some random thing that i wrote out of inspiration from the other two. ok fine.

so after i post this shit, i get messages from people telling me to relax and asking if i am talking about them, or who i'm talking about, etc. fucking insane. so let me break it down. what i wrote yesterday was not about one particular person. it was more of a conglomerate statement that encompassed about a decade's worth of shitbags who have wasted my time and heart over the years. sorry to burst anyone's bubble, but i don't give a shit about anyone enough at this point in time who would single-handedly be worth so much hatred. that's definitely a built up collective inspired by many different people.

now, on the other hand, i did put a bulletin on myspace today about 'friends' that don't return text messages. now that was personally directed at a few different people who have been mad shady lately. i'm not a complete dick so i'm not gonna mention names, but they know who the fuck they are.

and when i'm talking about people not returning texts, i'm not talking about some random 3am drunk text. i'm talking about in the middle of the afternoon. dinner time. you know, times when people are up and about. so like even if you can't hang out or whatever, at least have the fucking common courtesy to be like 'hey sorry i'm busy lemme hit you up tomorrow'. something. anything. because i know you saw that fucking text message. don't try telling me your phone was off or any of that bullshit. or, what you can really do is grow some fucking balls and tell me why you really can't answer my texts instead of just being a pussy and ignoring them.

people seem to forget who the fuck i am, and that i know everything. always. and if i don't know it now, it's only a matter of time until i find out. so there's really no need to be shady with me. and i'd respect you a lot more if you were just honest, regardless of our past personal history. so if you wanna get back with your alcoholic ex-boyfriend, that's fine. if you wanna go bang out some little boy at your job who feeds you drugs, whatever. if you wanna write off people that you've known for 8 years for people that you've known for 6 months, so be it. you do what the fuck you gotta do. just don't forget the people that were there for you when you needed it. because that's just dick if you do. and it's a good way to get yourself permanently cut out of my life. word up.

and for real. if you leave it off like that, don't even try to come running back to me when you get fucked over. because you will get fucked over eventually. and i hope you realize that.

and then my friends, that last post might just apply to you as well. don't forget that. and don't turn into one of those tombstones. because that would be a true shame. so start learning how to act.

<333

converge.

you fail me with every fatal crush
you fail me with every abandoned love
you fail me with your inferno fuck me eyes
that burn as fuel for my city and its neon lights
burn bright white line fever take them all
you fail me with your new dead end dream
you fail me with your pill box fantasy
you fail me as love's greatest war
that was never worth
you were never worth fighting for
dying living dying living dying everyday
living dying living dying living everyday
you think you are a poet
in your eyes you are a star
who lives through a fantasy of rising above
you think you're a victim
but you live as a drunk
that has never sacrificed that has never loved
you think you are tragic but i know you are lost
you have walked the fault lines
and you have crossed them all
this world doesn't fight you, you fight yourself
thinking we fail you
you fail yourself