i was born about a decade too late apparently.
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
Monday, December 29, 2008
thank god.
that i wasn't coming of age when this was going on:
granted, i did catch the very final tailwind of this phase, but i was never part of that thankfully. i'm so glad never wound up hitched to some big-haired 80s aquanet nightmare. but then again, in the late 80s and 90s, we did get screwed out of other things in our formative years. like girls who have huge tits in middle school because they've been drinking hormone-induced milk all their life. i'm convinced that is a reality.
when i was in middle school, there was like two girls in the entire school that had tits, and everyone in school knew who they were. go to the mall or drive past a high school and look around sometime. girls no older than like 13-14 with gigantic tits falling all over the place. i mean, that's awesome for these young dudes and all, but that shit is just not natural.
its totally fucked. they pump these cows full of hormones so that they produce milk basically 24 hours a day. that shit is definitely in the milk that people drink and it is definitely having it's effect on humanity in the form of big tits and asses on young girls.
who knows? maybe these hormones are responsible for the noticeably larger asses that white girls sport nowadays (and for that i'd be thankful since i missed out on all the big tits in middle school). or maybe they are responsible for the dumbing down of the youth and obsessions with celebrity gossip and reality tv. maybe, just maybe, these hormones are moving brain cells into mammary glands. that actually would be comforting to me, because then i'd be able to make some scientific sense out of the morons that i see on a daily basis talking about paris hilton.
thankfully i'm slightly lactose-intolerant and pretty much stopped drinking milk on a regular basis years ago. i really feel lucky for that.
granted, i did catch the very final tailwind of this phase, but i was never part of that thankfully. i'm so glad never wound up hitched to some big-haired 80s aquanet nightmare. but then again, in the late 80s and 90s, we did get screwed out of other things in our formative years. like girls who have huge tits in middle school because they've been drinking hormone-induced milk all their life. i'm convinced that is a reality.
when i was in middle school, there was like two girls in the entire school that had tits, and everyone in school knew who they were. go to the mall or drive past a high school and look around sometime. girls no older than like 13-14 with gigantic tits falling all over the place. i mean, that's awesome for these young dudes and all, but that shit is just not natural.
its totally fucked. they pump these cows full of hormones so that they produce milk basically 24 hours a day. that shit is definitely in the milk that people drink and it is definitely having it's effect on humanity in the form of big tits and asses on young girls.
who knows? maybe these hormones are responsible for the noticeably larger asses that white girls sport nowadays (and for that i'd be thankful since i missed out on all the big tits in middle school). or maybe they are responsible for the dumbing down of the youth and obsessions with celebrity gossip and reality tv. maybe, just maybe, these hormones are moving brain cells into mammary glands. that actually would be comforting to me, because then i'd be able to make some scientific sense out of the morons that i see on a daily basis talking about paris hilton.
thankfully i'm slightly lactose-intolerant and pretty much stopped drinking milk on a regular basis years ago. i really feel lucky for that.
Labels:
big hair,
celebrities,
cows,
hormones,
large asses,
middle school,
milk,
paris hilton,
reality tv,
tits
Sunday, December 28, 2008
babbles.
last night was quite eventful. my brother played a triple set at dingbatz with himself, cough and then kincaid. things got a little out of hand and some of my homegirls beat down some chick right on the dancefloor and most likely broke her leg. she kinda deserved it though. anyways, apparently i poured a beer on this broad while she was getting pounded and then grabbed her boyfriend by the neck because he tried to hit my boy. afterwards we went to dingos where i supposedly pulled my friend's tits out of her shirt and showed them to the guys in the kitchen. i don't remember doing that and i feel really bad about it if i did. i managed to get zero pictures of the show and i have little to no clear visual memories of the evening. so basically, everything went according to plan. i blame it all on the love of my life:
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
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